Monday, April 19, 2010

Study Says I Shoud Be Successful and Agressive! How 'bout You?

You may have seen the studies that came out recently, the first from psych professor Marjorie Gunnoe which concluded that kids who are spanked before age 6 grow up to be more successful than those who have not been spanked.

(I'm sure the challenge was to find someone from my generation who had NOT been spanked for purposes of comparison.)

But, hold on, along comes the Tulane University study from last week where it was shown that kids who were spanked more often at the age of 3 were more likely to be defiant and prone to temper tantrums. They also got easily frustrated, and displayed physical outbursts.

I'll go on record saying that VC has never been spanked. Ever. Yet, he amazingly appears to be an excellent student* I guess he is defying the odds. And he is also not aggressive, so I'm perhaps more inclined to go with the second study.

Two different studies; two totally different conclusions....Which do you believe?

I have a feeling these guys may have been spanked many times at the age of three:

photo credit: basic_sounds

*my intention in mentioning this is not to be all "I'm great" - just pointing this out as it relates to the study; I realize that although spanking is not for me (although when I was little it apparently WAS for me ;-) , different methods work depending on the child and parents.

**the Perricone giveaway ends tonight - so please stop on over here and enter!**

19 comments:

Kathie @ Just a Happy Housewife said...

I really don't know what to think...I think people in general are too different to say that one way is the best for all. I'm not big on spanking, but I've seen some pretty bratty kids that time out just does not work on. I remember once a guy I worked with who told me that his parents spanked him and he deserved it. He said he was a terrible kid. I think it just depends....just my opinion and I don't have any kids. :-)

Together We Save said...

Yes different children need different kinds of disipline.

Kristina P. said...

I think you can find studies to back up anything you want. I personally don't believe in physical punishment.

Kristin said...

We're a non spanking household...hopefully the dude won't be screwed up from our lack of hitting. Ah ha ha

NIKOL said...

I don't believe in spanking, because I think it would be hypocritical for me to tell my children they're not allowed to hit each other (or other kids) but then hit them as a form of discipline.

Michelle Pixie said...

I was spanked and I think I turned out fine and probably deserve it from time to time. But I also think if you are angry and hitting your child probably not the wisest idea {just my opinion coming from the receiving end}. I don't spank my kids. But I haven't hit those teenage years yet so ask me again in about 10 years. ;-)

Kaylen said...

I find it hard to teach someone a lesson using violence.
I have an aunt who babysits and I have seen her bite a toddler who was caught biting others. She felt she had to teach him what it was like...I was really horrified by it all-however, that boy did stop biting.

That said, hitting your child makes me really sad. One time while visiting my sister, my son (who has been spanked twice ever in life-out of desperation to stop him from an out-of-control tantrum)and I had to endure my bro-in-law spanking his 2 sons with a belt. Repeatedly. While the boys screamed and begged for him to stop. It was very traumatizing.

Jayne said...

I agree with Kristina P, you can find studies to back up anything. I think there is a world of difference between beating your child with a belt as described by Kaylen (and which I find OTT and frightening) and a swift rap across the knuckles when absolutely necessary and all else has failed. I think spanking has to be there as the ultimate sanction. (For the record, I used that ultimate sanction no more than once on both my girls).

Dual Mom said...

I think when you're child is an asshole, and nothing else is working, a good swift slap to the butt doesn't hurt them. Bring on Child Services.

Seriously, I have 3 who range in age from 18-12. I've "spanked" (which included my hand meeting their butt once) each of them once when they were young. Never ever had to do it again.

And just for statistical purposes, none of them are drug users, bullies, or have ever been in a juvenile detention facility. They also use the words "please" and "thank you" and hold doors open for people.

Dual Mom said...

Shoot that should be "your" not "you're".

JennyMac said...

My parents spanked us and my Hub's family did too (on occasion and not Joan Crawford style for either of us.) However, I feel in respect to both of us, it did ZERO good. I did not really deter me. Tell me I disappointed you? OUCH.

I don't want to spank MiniMac either.

And that pic is so crazy disturbing I have to wash my eyes. LOL.

~Kristen~ said...

I think, as a couple of other commenters mentioned above, anyone can find a study to back up their point of view. That said, I think it depends on the kid. While I think spanking should be an absolute last resort, sometimes it is warranted. There are some pretty awful kids out there...and awful parents, too, which is part of the problem. My brother and I were spanked a few times as kids, as was pretty much everyone I know in my generation. I think it was more common then. I also think that when we were kids our parents actually parented, rather than trying to be our friends. I see many of my friends now that have kids that are just not parenting...and their kids' behavior shows it. Some of them definitely need a good swat on the behind!

Lucy said...

I think in my generation (I'm 44) it was an acceptable form of discipline for the most part and it depends on all the variables of the study but it would be hard to find someone that wasn't spanked at one time or another in my time, on the other hand spanking is not as common today so studies are going to change with the tide.

blueviolet said...

Well, now that is just ridiculous! There are 6 of us in my family and all of us were spanked. I can tell ya for a fact that 3 out of the six are a mess, a hot mess!

buffalodick said...

I was an Alpha male most of my life- I'm still competitive! I did start thinking about the other person who didn't win, and started to understand we are both, or can be...

JoeyRes said...

I was spanked twice (as a kid) and I'm super successful. Not in a quantifiable sense, but I'm real happy.

Melissa B. said...

I was switched. Across my ankles. Forsythia bush stem. Does that count? 'Cause I'm not feelin' the success over here...

Amanda said...

I spank... but I believe that there is a time and a place and under pretty specific circumstances. I also believe that I am to raise my kids like the Bible says, and that is pretty specific too!

:)

I think things are different when you have more then one kid too..
I never spanked Colton until Parker came around. ;)

Be blessed!
Amanda

Unknown Mami said...

Obviously, VC is the exception to the rule. Excuse me, I need to go get my spank on. NOT!

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