Thursday, January 14, 2010

Oh, Just Doin' a Little Carbon Dating

Sometime this winter MB and I will be taking a trip courtesy of his company, to a swanky Caribbean resort. Me and MB staying at a swanky resort is amusing in itself, but not as amusing as my selection of swimsuits!

Realizing that the trip would mean I needed to wear a bathing suit (something I have only done a handful of times over the years) - I headed to the swimsuit drawer. And here are my findings:

Exhibit A: String binkini (circa 1992) and Tankini from when Tankinis first came out and were da bomb


Exhibit B: Mom Suits (circa 1998) - I purchased these when VC was 2 years old so that I wouldn't look like a ho in my skimpy bikinis at friend's neighborhood pool.

A quick survey of these suits prompted me to hit the mall in search of a more updated 2010 look, which brings me to my theory of why t*pless beaches are so popular. I was browsing the bikini top rack (a lot has changed since I last purchased a suit in 1998 - suits are now sold as separates. It's as if I've been caught up in a time warp) - Imagine my surprise when I discovered that the cost of a top was $87!!!!!!! $87 for a tiny top - what up wit dat???

I'll go t*pless before shelling out my hard earned money on a bikini top at that price (no I won't)

Which leads me to:

Exhibit C: Inexpensive suit I picked up off rack when shopping at big box store:
I tried it on a few days later and concluded that it was totally age inappropriate. And you know I'm all about being appropriate ;-) Yeah, so MB returned it for me today while he was out. And picked up a new murse while he was there....

Which leaves me back at square one: with a suit from 1993 or 1998. Do you think I should try them on to be sure the elastic won't completely disentegrate when I step into the pool?

Oh, I forgot to mention, all of this is basically a moot point, because chances are I'll be wearing this:
over my suit to protect my Casper skin. MB is reminded of that episode of Scrubs where Carla was slepping up the beach in her dowdy beach ensemble including baggy shorts and a wide brimmed golfing hat, which reminds me, I'm hoping I can fit my massive hat in my carry on bag...

What item of clothing do you have that could use a little carbon dating?

18 comments:

angelcel said...

I'd say that wearing a Body Glove top is pretty cool ... you surf dude you! :)

alessandra said...

Wow, congrats for your trip and...You must be happy that you can wear so "ancient" swimsuits, that means your body is still in shape ( no doubt about that ) ;-)

Kate said...

I love the pink one it gets my vote. Have a great time.

Kate xx

Amanda said...

I totally saw that episode of scrubs and totally agree with that being the BEST beach outfit! lol Er, did you say that? Maybe I just made up in my head that it is the best beach outfit.

I personally prefer a one piece and a t shirt. And really, you cant go wring with a black one piece!! :)

Kathie @ my net finds said...

you are lucky you're in swimsuit shape! :-) the last time I ever wore one (what is the point for me, I don't even know how to swim) without any type of cover up was when I was 10 years old at camp....the other girls made fun of me for being pale, so I never wore one again until high school PE for water volleyball and of course, I worse the world's longest t-shirt over it. :-) I say wear what ya want girlfriend!

Debbie said...

I have finally gotten accustomed to the fact that my swimsuits will be horribly matronly for the rest of my life. Oh well:)

Randi Troxell said...

it WAS way cute suite though..

Laura said...

Ummm any of those are better than what I would put my butt into right now!! Bring them all, you can never be too safe! :)

blueviolet said...

Woman, if you can still wear a bikini...you'd better do it! I wear a blanket!

Joy said...

I second blueviolet - wear it and work it! And we all know you can wear it.

Lucy said...

Won't you be busy doing other things than worrying about a bathing suit (LOL) No, you will look cute in the bikinis!!! Have fun!!!!

Leproust Vintage said...

ugh. I hate bathing suit shopping! You comment about not looking like a ho cracked me up! I was a nanny in college, and took the little one to a private club type pool. I purchased quite a few one pieces that year...I always felt so wrong wearing a skimpy suit even though it wasn't even my child!

Good luck finding a suit! For the record, I totally think you could have pulled off the pink one!

Triplets Plus Two Momma said...

Girl---you are a BELLY DANCER. That gives "age appropriate" a whole new meaning.

Go back and get the pink leapord one and then go to Target and get SPF100 or something like that :)

Kristin said...

Meow! You're gonna be one hot mama. Lucky duck. Bikinis are no longer an option for moi. The dude was a huge baby...I have a very short torso...You do the math. Ah ha ha

kys said...

Have fun on your trip! I'm a whitey, too. It's a PITA at the beach because cellulite is so much more attractive when tan.

My shoes and purses need tossed and replaced. I don't have too many other relics hanging around due to yo yo dieting and wardrobe replacement.

Fragrant Liar said...

Oh, good god, I threw out several suits in my fall cleaning efforts. I'd had those suits for YEARS, thinking one day, one day, I will fit back into them. And yes, the elastic had disintegrated. What a picture that was.

I like the cute pink suit, and if you can fit into it, go for it! If not, go hunting for another one. There's bound to be something you'll like better somewhere.

Aunt Juicebox said...

I would go for the one piece just because I've always been afraid of jumping into the water, then surfacing to find one (or both) of the girls free floating in the ocean.

A Woman Of No Importance said...

Casper Skin - Me likey that description - I too am prone to That Lobster Look! Glad to hear you had a fab vacay, but on the Richter front, perhaps that didn't help your being prone to worriting things, Carma - I would have been frit to bits! xox

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